a person’s pain can’t be erased by another’s gifts. time, money, and love must not be given in expectation of their relief. likewise, do not withhold these things in expectation of yours. we’re taught that what we give makes people better but this isn’t always true, and sometimes creates crippling co-dependence. it’s the reception of people in whatever state they arrive in that prompts deep healing, because all states except love are temporary. expectation is the thief.