2021-01-17, leaving

the horizon for me looks bright but i’ll admit – i’m scared.
i left my home last month to move to another part of the world and foster a new relationship with someone i fell in love with six months ago. i think we’re going to try to have a baby but i’m not sure i’ll ever have one. at least according to my doctor.
everything is changing rapidly and sometimes i can’t tell if i’m being pushed, pulled or dragged.
i’m usually the person that people come to for advice and while i love holding space for friends and family, i often find there’s no one around to hold that same space for me. no one outside of my boyfriend that is.
but i don’t mean to sound ungrateful because i feel gratitude for everything that’s come my way.
i don’t know why i feel nervous speaking to you all so i’ll stop for a moment to catch my breath.
wow, i’m overwhelmed by your faces staring back at me with such love.
thank you.
thank you.
thank you.