Blog poetry WRITING

self-loathing

self-loathing

how long before you hate me? before you call me every disgusting name you’d always known belonged to me? how long before the compulsion to watch me suffer and self-destruct makes you turn away in laughter? how many ways can there be to humiliate naive and blinded love? how many of my words continue to mispronounce your silence? if i kill mommy and daddy will you love me again? how many babies do i need to have before realizing no one is strong enough to nurture me? how many medications do i need to take before feeling something other than pain? how many times did i need to open my legs to realize i was penetrated by nothing but pity and fascination.

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